Girls, Girls, Girls

Today on my mind is the topic of girls, or more PC, women. Basically its a topic, that even though sounds the same, I will express some of my personal experience on them.

So in the past few, I basically haven't had any luck with them. ZIP, NOTTA. Sounds sad doesn't it? I even set my self a goal in college, which was to maybe find a lady for my self. Apart from meeting new friends, learning and having fun, maybe finding my self a self a girl wasn't such a bad idea. I mean where else better than college right?

Yeah so after 3 years of some trying, nothing really worked. Why, you might be thinking? Mostly I think its on my part. Shit I'm a 21 year old, and im still shy as a mother F. Thinking back, honestly I think I could of found my self one, but due to my lack of ice breakers and iniating something, I fucked up. The women I meet are from all over the place; class, the library, my house, going out to the bars, walking around, activties, you name it. But somehow It just doesn't work out. I've pinpointed the problem to my self. Yeah, maybe my physical shape isn't the best of everything, but I'm still working on that. But I realize, fucking up on this part of my life isnt so bad yet. I mean if I was 30 years old still doing this shit, I would have to re-evaluate on what I have to do.

Let me give you some examples, I met this really great looking girl in class once. I knew something might be going right, if shes constanly asking me to hang out/study. But you know what? MY LACK OF BULLOCKS, really fucked me up. Everytime we met or hung out, I didn't do jack shit. In basketball terms, I couldnt advance the ball pass half court. I was just a sitting duck. Then she basically lost interest and now were just friends. Friends is fine, but sometimes its just not the best of what can happen out of a situation. And now that I'm leaving OSU behind, I think that my chances of finding one has gone down substantially. But, life isnt TOO short, so I will keep trying, and I'm not going to complain because I don't to sound emo, and I can always get my self on track.

Being chicken shit isn't just being me being scared. It has to do with my level of confidence. I think my biggest fear is rejection. Me being rejected from something is worst than my fear of death, being stabbed, or even a bear attacking me. So I think I should just free up my mind and take a stab at it harder from now on.

So, after summer school, I think I might take a few vacations, and relax my self, maybe that time off will help me recooperate some of my social skills. Heck, when and If I go to Canada this summer, something may happen! ha.

Peace,
Kent